About Me

I’ve been divorced for 12 years. I love being single. I’m happy that I am free to check my own oil, refill my own washer fluid, and pump my own gas. However, in saying that, it’s not for everybody. I’ve had to learn how to use a drill, take apart a bed, put together a bed, and most exciting, I’m more than capable of carrying about fifty pounds of groceries up three flights of stairs. That’s right, because I’m single, I get to do this all for myself. I don’t have to say “Thank you dear, for carrying this”, “Thank you honey, for fixing my car”, I don’t have to thank anyone or be grateful to anyone for anything. It’s awesome that I have all the freedom in the world!!!

Freedom… it’s worth all the heartache.

Freedom… it’s worth it.

Freedom…it’s in you to give.

Now, if only I could change a tire.



259 thoughts on “About Me

  1. Pingback: About Me – VinLand Blog

  2. Hahaha…love your view of “singledom” (I found your blog at Lucky Otter’s Haven – Share a post Saturday.) I am 50+ and divorced for eight years. The freedom I gained from an alcoholic spouse is priceless. I’m happier & healthier today and enjoying life like never before. Like anything, there are pros & cons, but I (currently) have no interest in getting married again. This is my time and I’m enjoying the freedom, too!

    Liked by 3 people

  3. I found you while surfing other blogs. Your title intrigued me. Now you just make me laugh. Read a couple of posts on the way here. I was finally single at 62 I love being single. What I can’t do, I can hire or barter for the doing. Being single is underrated.

    Liked by 4 people

  4. Being a single is not fun. The Number 1 thing in the human’s life is the relationship which makes humans happy and this secret found after 75 years of research.

    after failing in true love, anyone can live a life being a single… but it is not really easy…so do not say it, you are happy…..nature can’t be wrong. Sorry if sound crazy.

    Liked by 3 people

      • Things always don’t work the way we want but this is our job to make it work for us…. you are the first person i met who claim to be happy being a single, this idea is a little bit stranger to me. “interesting”

        Liked by 1 person

      • O ya , you are right but it’s not the complete happiness which humans needs.Relationship has big role in happiness and cannot be ignore 100%. it’s a little bit confusing but there is no harm to try to understand.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Ok. But I don’t understand your confusion with someone saying they are happy. Why would you even question it, argue against it, and tell them they are wrong?

        Liked by 1 person

      • O ya because, it’s a life major issue, being a single is against the nature,i am on the nature side,and i believe, Love Is Life.
        In some science fiction movies this topic has been described very deeply.
        and Do not mind my comments, the topic is interesting that’s why I want to discuss it even more. I am gonna read a lot about it.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Ok, so find someone who says they are happy and tell them that they aren’t…. and argue with them when they repeatedly say they are actually happy. Tell them, no, you can’t be happy.

        That’s actually NOT a nice thing to do.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Oh! again missing the point.I am on your blog and the page is about me ! and the page says being a single is freedom! okay if you want to argue I have millions of points that it is not a freedom. stop it or continue?


      • You are telling me I am wrong to be happy single. That is messed up. Never tell someone they are wrong to be happy about anything. Leave people’s happiness alone.

        I’ve never met anyone who spent this much of their time telling someone it was WRONG TO BE HAPPY. How is being happy wrong?

        Ok, here, I’ll go get a man and be miserable because Zada told me too. Does that work for you?

        Liked by 1 person

  5. I can’t imagine my happiness being based on anyone else but myself. My children make me happy, being outside makes me happy, riding my motorcycle makes me happy, eating ice cream makes me happy, being at my job makes me happy, my friends make me happy, the sunset and sunrise make me happy, looking in the mirror makes me happy, photography makes me happy, my bed makes me happy, a good hot cup of tea makes me happy, I could go on for hours about the things that make me happy but absolutely none of those things have anything to do with a partner. I have been in a relationship depending on them to make me happy… It was not real. I have been in a relationship with someone who depended on me to make them happy and it was completely exhausting. I guarantee you at 52 years old I know myself, I know what makes me happy and what doesn’t. I can’t imagine feeling so dependent on someone else for something so important and I can’t imagine what it must be like to be so unhappy with my own life that I have to try and convince others they are wrong in the choices THEY make for THEMSELVES. PEACE, LOVE AND GROOVINESS (trust me it will make you happy)

    Liked by 3 people

  6. Zoda,

    Being married or single is a choice. For instance, Catholic priests can’t marry and becoming a priest is a choice, but most priests live very full lives. There is also a village where all men are banned and onlyh women live there. It’s Umoja, Kenya,


    In fact, there is plenty of evidence that marriage and monogamy goes against human nature. If marriage was so great, why do so many marriages end in divorce?

    You hold a view, an opinion, that not everyone agrees with. For instance, “Here’s Why The Idea of ‘Traditional Marriage’ Is Total Bullsh*t”


    Marriage is a choice. Here’s a piece in Time Magazine on “Why 25P of Millennials Will Never Get Married”


    And Psychology Today reports on “Why Some People Can’t Find Anyone to Marry”


    Then there is Mount Athos in Greece where women are not allowed. Women have been forbidden from setting foot there for over 1,000 years. The men that live there do so by choice.


    Liked by 3 people

  7. Zada, I challenge you to list your 1 million reasons that being single isn’t a natural choice and make sure to link those opinions to facts that provide proof they are arguably correct.

    Simply put, being single or married is a choice. Genetically, most men and women are not designed to be faithful to one mate for life. And being faithful to your mate, married or not, is also a choice. That’s why husbands and wives cheat on each other.

    “Evolutionary psychologists have suggested that men are more likely to have extramarital sex, partially due to the male urge to “spread genes” by broadcasting sperm. Both males and females, these scientists say, try to up their evolutionary progress by seeking out high-quality mates, albeit in different ways.”

    The committed partnership between a man and a woman evolved, some say, for the well-being of children.

    “The human species has evolved to make commitments between males and females in regards to raising their offspring, so this is a bond,” said Jane Lancaster, an evolutionary anthropologist at the University of New Mexico. “However that bond can fit into all kinds of marriage patterns – polygyny, single parenthood, monogamy.”


    Liked by 3 people

    • Actually, I would like to read a million reasons that I’m wrong to be happy. That makes me happy, that I’m wrong to be happy. Wrong. To. Be. Happy.


  8. Pingback: Ten Reasons Why I’m Wrong To Be Happy « Skinny and Single

  9. That exchange with Zada explains it all. I totally agree that if your can’t be happy by yourself your chances of being happy for long with someone else are slim to none. If you NEED someone else to make you happy, that’s dependency and very fragile. I’ve tried to be the happymaker and know well how Sisyphus felt rolling that rock up the mountain.

    Liked by 3 people

  10. Shareen,

    But we don’t know if Zada is a him or her and what country/culture him or her lives in or grew up in. This afternoon I listened to a program about women in Afghanistan and they estimate that 85 percent of women in Afghanistan are victims of physical domestic violence.

    Liked by 2 people

    • A Motherdick has no gender. Just basic douchebag …that you ever so skillfully covered. I can tell that having been to the region -it’s a fact. It doesn’t cover all Arab countries like say Lebanon but in this instance specific to Afghanistan & Syria which I almost got arrested at the border at 18 for -you guessed it talking shit to a Syrian Soldier- this is true. I have seen the refugee camps. I have spoken to the women in Arabic and I know after more interviews than I can even count that people like Zada hate anyone who undermines their authority. I am Lebanese but if you have met any of the women in my family you will know that the culture is different & douchebags run a fucking muck I’m concentrated areas. They reduce to the lowest most ignorant common denominator . Oh, and I love you. I mean that in a non -creepy-happily married blog crush way. Love , love you. 💋💋💋💋

      Liked by 2 people

  11. Lloyd , I enjoy changing my own tires said me Never. However, I did learn how but only because I’m a Red Cross Disaster first responder and I own a Jeep with a wench so I can pull people out of places they get stuck. I didn’t learn this for practical reasons . I don’t volunteer for practical reasons either. I just need to know where everything is when the world implodes so I can be like Trump and be an opportunist. When the apocalypse happens …which I now firmly believe will start because Laura is single and happy and Zada is probably one of those people who is a hacker and gets the nuclear codes from Hilary’s emails –anyway as I was saying as a Trained , certified volunteer I will know where all the supplies are so like Trump who loved the housing crash I will capitalize on the world ending with my volunteerism and Tiring changing skills. I will do it wearing a skirt, perfect hair and Louis Vuitton…classy and shit

    Liked by 4 people

  12. If the world goes to shit and civilization collapses, I’d like to suggest wearing blue jeans and boots. Gear: back pack, freeze dried rations, water, lots of water, and have a cabin in a remote wilderness area that’s well hidden from the crazed zombie masses. Classy, sexy clothes don’t do well in the wilderness. In fact, instead of jeans, camouflage military field issue clothing to help blend into the wilderness and make it harder for the crazed mob and zombies to spot you moving around in the bush. Oh, and a crossbow like that guy in the Walking Dead. Firearms make too much noise, alerts the crazed mob and zombies.

    Weapons: I have an arsenal but should stock up more ammo, and lots of knives of all sizes.

    Liked by 2 people

  13. Lloyd- I’m actually really certified lol. I did volunteer K-9 search and rescue with my dog. I have a full gear bag and Nursing bag, studied nursing and can do field stitches etc. I would never wear a skirt or anything that’s not field tested. However, Louis Vuitton is actually really strong sturdy luggage. I wouldn’t use it but I will defend my luggage -ha! My gear bag is the same that all FEMA use. It’s ready to go and I keep it updated. I do yearly training sessions and run not for fun but so I can take care of myself. I’m also a damn good shot with exception of a shot gun. I can’t do a shot gun accurately but damn good with a pistol and it’s not pink. I’m a balanced woman. My dad told us that we should never expect anyone to take care of us. We better be able to take care of ourselves. I’m high maintenance but I maintain myself. If I can’t buy it for myself I don’t expect it to be bought for me. My husband loves that I’m able to do all the things myself and still go to a fundraiser all dressed up. I prefer not to be dressed up but will do it!

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Sounds like you are ready for the the zombie apocalypse. You don’t have to be a good shot to use a shotgun. Just point at the target and pull trigger. Repeat if anything is left of the target. Shotguns are actually safer for other people on the other side of the target. Heavy caliber rounds tend to go through the target and a few walls and anyone in between that wasn’t a target.

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Way to own your singleness (is that a word?)! I’ve been happily married for 24 years but I still try to be independent, although I really hate dealing with car issues. i tell my husband all the time that’s why I keep him around!

    Liked by 3 people

  16. Hello Dear,

    You have a beautiful blog here. I loved your theme. Great content and the colours are easy on the eyes.I was intrigued to read it and was wondering if you and I could be collaborators. I am a new blogger and started my humble blog some three months ago and had almost 3,300 followers. I believe blogging community is the most supportive and encouraging community. I want some writers as well. I kept unwell and was looking for someone who would like to post on my blog too. I would be highly obliged if you take a look at my blog and allow me an opportunity to collaborate with you. I love to write and write for some Ezines and Webzines like Roberta Pimentel and The Millionaire’s Digest. I write poetry, free articles, short stories and all other things. I can write content you want and word limit can be followed too.

    Warm Regards

    Liked by 2 people

  17. I just joined the club not too long ago, 40’s, single, but not quite skinny… yet 😉
    Though I’m happy where I am. I embrace my uniqueness.
    I like the wit of your posts. Thanks for the “follow”… just followed you back.
    More power to you. 🙂

    Liked by 3 people

  18. You wouldn’t think I would would blend in well here, I’m a househusband, not nearly as skinny as I should be, but I am in my 40’s. Despite the differences, I love what I’ve seen of your blog thus far! I’m looking forward to following.

    Liked by 3 people

  19. Hey!!
    Thank you for following my blog! Yesterday I was searching on parenting and I came across your blog. your approach towards expression is open to all, and I like your writing! I am about to start my blog and you return me the favor, it has given me a great motivation towards writing. thanx once again.

    Liked by 2 people

  20. That why even men belong to AAA so if we have a flat, lock ourselves out of the car, run out of gasoline if we still drive a gas-powered auto, or have a dead battery, we call AAA and let them take care of it. I think I pay less than $40 a year to belong to AAA’s roadside asistance program.



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